The Beauty of Aging

Randi Davis

Our culture has perpetuated an unusual and unnatural view of getting old. The critique of "being run by old white men" and the complement of "she has a youthful look" both give the word "old" a negative connotation. "Young and beautiful" are being accepted as synonymous alongside "old and feeble". Advertisers choose kids in their early twenties to depict the idea of beauty in almost all attempts to sell us their products. In conjunction with those images, we see the media depicting the old as senile, decript, and incapable.

It was my birthday last week. I guess it's understandable why growing old is on my mind. These cultural ideas of becoming old continue to clash with everything my experience has shown to be the truth about growing old. I am continually astounded that each year my birthday comes and I feel better, more confident in myself and in my testimony, wiser and more experienced, able to have a better perspective, more and more capable, beautiful in my "new" aging skin, and also incredibly content.

This conflict between what the "world" pushes as truth and what I experience becomes more obvious as I age. One example is the idea that the scientific process and faith are mutually exclusive. My husband has gotten the question, "How can you be a man of faith when you are so critical, analytical, and disbelieving in so many other areas of your life?" I love my husband's thoughts on this. He has said that there is nothing that he is more sure of than the feeling he gets after reading the Book of Mormon. That is something that he has actually felt and witnessed the consequences of for himself. He claims that you need to have more faith when you believe scientists who have done all this research and are concluding things that you have never seen, never witnessed for yourself. Of course, we have faith in the scientific reasoning of others who have gone through the work and effort and trials and errors to find truth. Of course, we can read about their experiences and believe the things they say, but isn't that requiring more faith than believing the things that we can witness from our own experiences, our own trial and error, our own use of the scientific process?

This is one of the benefits of getting old. It is the time that is needed to test our faith and find, over and over again, the truths of the gospel. President Boyd K. Packer had these beautiful thoughts on growing old:

In 1992, having served nine years as an Assistant to the Twelve and 22 years as a member of the Twelve, I reached the age of 68. I felt impressed to start what I called an “Unfinished Composition.” The first part of that work goes like this:

I had a thought the other night,

A thought profound and deep.
It came when I was too worn down,
Too tired to go to sleep.

I’d had a very busy day
And pondered on my fate.
The thought was this:
When I was young, I wasn’t 68!

I could walk without a limp;
I had no shoulder pain.
I could read a line through twice
And quote it back again.

I could work for endless hours
And hardly stop to breathe.
And things that now I cannot do
I mastered then with ease.

If I could now turn back the years,
If that were mine to choose,
I would not barter age for youth,
I’d have too much to lose.

I am quite content to move ahead,
To yield my youth, however grand.
The thing I’d lose if I went back
Is what I understand.

Ten years later, I decided to add a few more lines to that poem:

Ten years have flown to who knows where
And with them much of pain.
A metal hip erased my limp;
I walk quite straight again.

Another plate holds neck bones fast—
A wonderful creation!
It backed my polio away;
I’ve joined the stiff-necked generation.

The signs of aging can be seen.
Those things will not get better.
The only thing that grows in strength
With me is my forgetter.

You ask, “Do I remember you?”
Of course, you’re much the same.
Now don’t go getting all upset
If I can’t recall your name.

I would agree I’ve learned some things
I did not want to know,
But age has brought those precious truths
That make the spirit grow.

Of all the blessings that have come,
The best thing in my life
Is the companionship and comfort
I get from my dear wife.

Our children all have married well,
With families of their own,
With children and grandchildren,
How soon they all have grown.

I have not changed my mind one bit
About regaining youth.
We’re meant to age, for with it
Comes a knowledge of the truth.

You ask, “What will the future bring?
Just what will be my fate?”
I’ll go along and not complain.
Ask when I’m 88!

And last year I added these lines:

And now you see I’m 88.
The years have flown so fast.
I walked, I limped, I held a cane,
And now I ride at last.

I take a nap now and again,
But priesthood power remains.
For all the physical things I lack
There are great spiritual gains.

I have traveled the world a million miles
And another million too.
And with the help of satellites,
My journeys are not through.

I now can say with all certainty
That I know and love the Lord.
I can testify with them of old
As I preach His holy word.

I know what He felt in Gethsemane
Is too much to comprehend.
I know He did it all for us;
We have no greater Friend.

I know that He will come anew
With power and in glory.
I know I will see Him once again
At the end of my life’s story.

I’ll kneel before His wounded feet;
I’ll feel His Spirit glow.
My whispering, quivering voice will say,
“My Lord, my God, I know.”

Whenever I read this poem, my heart wants to shout, "This is Truth!" This is what we should internalize about getting old. I feel the spirit SO strongly in President Packer's testimony and because of that, because of what I have actually felt, I have faith in my savior, Jesus Christ. I know that when I follow Christ's teachings my life is better. I am filled with more hope and joy. My relationships with others are richer. I am more peaceful and content. These are the results of my scientific process, of my aging.

I hope all of you, my sisters in Christ, find and remember the beauty of aging. I hope you have a wonderful day... and find out for yourself that it really is a better day when you follow Jesus.

Randi Davis
Manor Neighborhood
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